BILLINGS

Josh Billings was the pen name of 19th-century American humorist Henry Wheeler Shaw (April 21, 1818 – October 14, 1885). He was a famous humor writer and lecturer in the United States during the latter half of the 19th century. He is often compared to Mark Twain
Shaw attended Hamilton College, but was expelled in his second year for removing the clapper of the campus bell. He married Zipha E. Bradford in 1845.

Shaw worked as a farmer, coal miner, explorer, and auctioneer before he began making a living as a journalist and writer in Poughkeepsie, New York, in 1858. Under the pseudonym "Josh Billings" he wrote in an informal voice full of the slang of the day, with often eccentric phonetic spelling, dispensing wit and folksy common-sense wisdom.
His saying, "In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money can not buy... to wit the wag of a dog's tail" appears at the beginning of the Disney film Lady and the Tramp.
The phrase, "Love is like measles... the later in life it occurs, the tougher it gets," was quoted as being Josh Billings' in Jan Karon's book, A Light in the Window.
While the Squeaky Wheel analysis was used in different forms before Billings, his poem, "The Kicker" brought the idiom into common usage of American language. The term "kicker" at the time in the 1800s was another term for a complainer. The poem is:
I hate to be a kicker,
I always long for peace,
But the wheel that does the squeaking,
Is the one that gets the grease.
"Consider the postage stamp, son. It secures success through its ability to stick to one thing till it gets there."


Adam invented love at first sight, one of the greatest labor-saving machines the world ever saw.
 
Be like a (postage) stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.

Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are, and doing things as they ought to be done. (ironic, have a tendency to do sth) 2. for: have a talent, skill for sth)

Don't mistake pleasure for happiness. They are a different breed of dogs.

Don't put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.

It ain't what a man don't know that makes him a fool, but what he does know that ain't so.

It's not what a man doesn't know that makes him a fool. It's what he knows for sure that ain't so.

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.

Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it.
 
Men who have much to say use the fewest words.

Most people when they come to you for advice, come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected.

One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.

Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does.

Remember the poor, it costs nothing.

Rumor is like bees; the more you fight them the more you don't get rid of them. 
  
Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute. [Science is] the literature of truth.

Solitude is a good place to visit, but a poor place to stay.

The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust. (to say nothing, although you want to speak)

The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.

The time to pray is not when we are in a tight spot but just as soon as we get out of it.

The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.

There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory. 

There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they actually can't tell the truth without lying.

There is but one thing that money can not buy; to wit, the wag of a dog's tail. *  namely (specifically: concretamente), to wit (that is to say, that is, a saber, esto es)

There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.

There is not a whole lot of fun in medicine but there is a whole lot of medicine in fun.

There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply.

There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it.

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